The Fire With In: A Domestic Violence Resource Blog

"On average, 24 people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner in the United States — more than 12 million women and men over the course of a year." "1 in 4 women (24.3%) and 1 in 7 men (13.8%) aged 18 and older in the United States have been the victim of severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime."  "From 1994 to 2010, about 4 in 5 victims of intimate partner violence were female" "81% of women who experienced rape, stalking, or physical violence by an intimate partner reported significant short- or long-term impacts such as post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms and injury" 1 in 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence each year, and 90% of these children are eyewitnesses to this violence "30 to 60% of perpetrators of intimate partner violence also abuse children in the household."  "One in 10 high school students has experienced physica...

When it comes to domestic violence and abusive relationships, there seems to be a societal view that if the abuse is that bad, why doesn't a person just leave? There becomes a societal stigma, whether said out loud or not that a women must have done something to be abused, or enjoys the abuse. Authors Nancy Rhodes and Eva Baranoff McKenzie (1998) write "battered women learn to see themselves as functionally helpless and powerless to escape their situation. Therefore, they remain not because they want to but because they believe there is no point in trying to get out....the repeated batterings, like electrical shocks, diminish the woman’s motivation to respond.". Women often try their best to improve the relationship, thinking if they just did "such and such" different, or cared more, things would be better."A significant number of women remain in violent relationships due to their belief that they can save their partners from violence. If she perceives he...

Your life is a blank canvas, So bare and empty, You can hear the sound of its forgotten existence Meaningless A burst of explosive color Paint messily strewn about It dances about the background Flashes of warm and blissfulness Bleeding downward in pain and regret You can hear the harmony and dissonance in its movement and shapes. Once a stroke is laid upon, it can not be erased Can be pilled on by decision and decision of overwhelming color Chipped away at, To try to expose pictures of the past But can not be repeated This painting will never be created again Can be copied by others But will never be the same You are the artist A masterpiece waiting to happen An epiphany Then it is gone It is done, done forever. Do you want to be the painting everyone is inspired to see? Or the knock off, hidden away in the shadows Afraid of its true potential to be great and make a difference. Your life is a blank canvas. Picture source:https://www.bloglovin.com/blog...

Domestic Violence victims are often filled with shame; shame from their abuse, and shame for staying the abusive relationship. Often victims may deny their abuse, or downplay their abuse, because they are often afraid how they will be treated by others. Being abused, and admitting to yourself the abuse, makes you a victim, being a victim often comes with the idea of being weak.  Author Wendy Patrick, of Psychology Today (2018) explains other examples of reasons victims are silenced "reporting the perpetrator´s behavior would involve revealing embarrassing and humiliating details they would rather never discuss—especially if they have been enduring this treatment for years.", she also writes "victims with children fear being labeled a “bad parent” for staying with a violent partner.  It is easier for some victims in this situation to rationalize they are living with a bad spouse, but a good parent.". People often blame victims for returning to an abusive relations...

Picture source:https://afternarcissisticabuse.wordpress.com/2014/11/28/it-wasnt-love/